Gerber and Plum Join Forces for 1/2 the Disappointment

Stomach status update: still an asshole. So it’s time for another day of veggie mush that has been dubiously classified as “food.”

First up, Gerber Organic Butternut Squash.


I didn’t buy this one; it was given to me by my roommate, who ate baby food for a bit following the removal of their tonsils this past December. I should have been suspicious of rejected baby food, but hey, I like free shit!


This stuff looks about how you would expect pureed squash to look, and it doesn’t smell too bad. But the taste…man, I don’t understand how something can be simultaneously blandly vague in flavor and yet also indescribably gross. It’s also strangely slightly grainy. I mean, I know I’m used to butternut squash flavored with butter or olive oil or salt and pepper or something, but this is awful. 1.5 out 0f 5 stars.

Okay, anything has got to be better than that shit, right? Although Plum Organics disappointed me so thoroughly with its Pears and Quinoa bullshit, not all of their flavors can be bad, right? Right?

So here we have Plum Mighty 4 Essential Nutrition Blend: Purple Carrot, Blackberry, Quinoa, and Greek Yogurt.


Again, this contains a lot of things, but these things might actually all go together. I hope. Probably.


It’s very purple and smells quite fruity and pleasant. And oh. My. God. It is DELICIOUS. It just tastes like a normal smoothie that a normal adult would drink and it has 3 grams of protein, which is quite a lot for baby food.

Thank you, Plum. You have redeemed yourself as a purveyor of squishy foods. 5 out of 5 stars.


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